RIP Mr. Petunia

Peaceful Kingdom

Sleeping beauties; Beacon top, Frankie bottom
These two have become fast friends.
Beacon loves Frankie and Frankie loves the love.

Priority

Sometimes we get lost in our own little world, doing what we do. I remember not too long ago my entire life was shaped and molded by my work. I could pick up and go, do what I wanted and not think a thing about it. When Beacon came along everything changed. Suddenly and already into my 50's I was responsible for someone other than myself. He needed daily care to live. He still does, and I have not regretted one no, one I can't, or one maybe next time. I didn't know I had it in me, and still have a hard time wrapping my head around how easily I transitioned. I thought I was pretty smart, had read all the right books, was into all the right things at the right time, yet none of it matters now. He is my number one, and he is beautiful.
We talk about priorities, and make lists of our most important things, but how important are they, really. I said no again the other day to someone who wanted me to travel for a perfume engagement. It would have taken me away from Beacon for three days. I love my work, love the success, but I love him more...

Inner Circle

My closest, and most cherished friends have fur.

Soul Trane

Been listening to John Coltrane.Live at the Village Vanguard, thinking about how similar we are to music. How the vibration of music is the vibration of life and we are part of it.
Watching little Beacon sleeping this morning, how he has to position himself in a particular way to be comfortable. He sleeps more now. An unshakably deep sleep. I touch him and he makes a little sound. He knows it is me. He depends on me, I will not let him down.

Above and Beyond

The work of caring for animals goes on. Even in these lean times. We are at our limit now, but have agreed to take in at least two more cats, to avoid the owners taking them to a county shelter. An open invitation, a just in case. We are here.
I know there are several private caregivers in my area, who had shelters, but due to lack of funding had to close their doors. To make things worse one of the towns near us has put a new law on their books to limit the number of cats and dogs people can have in their homes. What do they expect, that people can just toss out their family members only to have them killed at a county shelter.  Where are the smart people. Every level of government in this country seems to be run by a fringe group of morons. And if not run by them, another fringe group of morons are trying to claw their way to power.
When it comes to animals I take a very bold stand. And will not mince words when their safety and care are at issue.
Bless all of the wonderful people who share their lives with animals, take in strays and donate their time and money to no kill shelters. There are true heroes among us.

Save

As much as you like to think so, you cannot save every stray animal, wandering soul, sick person, the planet and the Universe, so you may as well take a little time and save yourself. Words of wisdom from a dear friend. Truth ringing in my ears, but not quite convincing me to stop and smell the flowers; and yes I get the irony.
I should probably post this as well to Beacons blog, because it is he who has me thinking this early a.m. He could not sleep. Up and down all night. Nudging me to rub his head, cuddle with him, only to have him dart off the edge of the bed and to the door.  Finally I gave in and let him go. Out the door and down the steps, like a dash, on his two front legs. This is only happening because I too am up. Otherwise he would realize that he was alone in the dark, and it would begin, an unending cry of epic proportions. Unending until I walk down the stairs, grab him in my arms and take him back to bed. This could go on many times throughout a night. When he is restless I am restless. So here we are.
Beacon is two years old this month, and looking back over our journey so far, I can say that I have become an expert at reading him. He goes through cycles which are primarily based on his body's digestive tract, and his ability to utilize food and process waste.
Later today he will be out like a light. Most days he is like this. The stress of getting around, the energy expended is much more noticeable now that he is fully grown. Yet that doesn't stop him when he is on a roll. He, can out maneuver all of the other cats, out run them and out fox them. The only thing he can't do is jump. So he has learned to pull himself up on furniture, maneuver onto table tops and on some occasions, get stuck, scaring the crap out of me. Which prompts me to make the rounds throughout the day, looking for him, making sure he is safe.
In all honesty, I do not believe that I can save the world, or myself. At least not in a way that would be efficient. I do feel however that I am saved. Not in a religious way, but in a way that allows me to be at ease in the world. For as much as I may seem restless, I am very much at peace with life. Adhering to the Tao Pooh philosophy I focus my attention to the present moment. Always observant, always taking it all in. It is amazing how much we are able to understand through calm and silence. Amazing how easy it is to let go. Knowing that the extraneous things that define me today, I can walk away from at any moment and be complete. Knowing that blood is thicker than water, and that beating hearts trump everything else.